Live With Eternal Perspective Podcast Episode 037 Time For A Meltdown
Welcome to the Terri Hitt – Live With Eternal Perspective Podcast
Episode #037 – Time For a Meltdown
Thank you for entrusting and investing your precious time with me to grow in Jesus together. I am blessed to be back with you today to discuss more ways to live with eternal perspective.
Four years ago today, my precious youngest daughter underwent her second open heart surgery. Because she has a unique heart that holds several defects in the physical way it works, this surgery was the only procedure she could have. Although it did not heal her heart, she gained more time and a greater quality of life on this earth.
This past weekend I was remembering a time we went shopping not long before she was to be admitted for this life-changing operation. We had done our best to prepare our sweet girl, but since she had only been with us one year, there were still gaps in communicating information. As usual, we used words, pantomimes, and drawings to get information across to her, which worked most of the time, but understanding the depth of what she was about to undergo was difficult. Plus, she only had her first experience in China to compare to. It was not the best experience.
On that particular day, I dropped Marissa off at dance, then drove to the nearest Target to run a needed shopping errand I wanted to complete before it was time to return for her. We were on a tight schedule and I told Brooklyn what we were doing because when time is tight, she appreciates the warning. She always balked when plans were not clear to her, but was very accommodating when she knew what was going to happen next. Brooklyn seemed perfectly fine with our plan, and asked if we could look at the toys while we were in the store. She liked that I usually shopped for the needed items first, then let her peruse the toy section before leaving. “Sure,” I told her. “We’ll look before we go back to get Marissa.”
Letting Brooklyn look around the toy department is usually not a problem, and everything went well in the store until she found a toy she liked. She knows we don’t purchase toys at every visit to the store, and she usually doesn’t ask for things, but on this day, a Nerf-styled dart gun caught her attention and she did not want to put the item down.
I reminded her that we were not going to buy a toy that day. Plus, it was something she didn’t usually ask for. Legos are her style, and she didn’t even give them much attention that day.
No reasoning with her or denials penetrated her desire for the cheap piece of plastic that would end up on our floor at home, forgotten and neglected. This gun, a weapon of destruction in battles was forming a war between mother and child and I could see that neither of us would escape without wounds.
Now in tears, my girl very hesitantly went with me to the check-out lane to purchase our items and get back to dance to pick up Marissa on time. I knew deep in my heart that this meltdown was not about a dart gun. Fear was boiling up from her carefully controlled exterior. Her surgery was a few days away and she was looking for any sense of control that she could find.
My youngest cried all the way to get her sister and on the way home afterwards. Because of the tight schedule we were on, I did not have time to stop and stay in the parking lot to cradle or talk to her. After picking her sister up, I just wanted to get home, get out of the car, and comfort her. I can remember taking time to try to talk a little when we got in the car at Target, but she was too keyed up at the time. We had to wait to get home. By then, she had cried long enough that she could finish at home and begin to regulate as the cycle began to break. I remember later rocking with her and talking about the real reason she was so upset and how we were going to handle those big, scary emotions and fears about the upcoming surgery.
How brave she was. How trusting. At the time she did not know Jesus as her Savior. She had heard about Him through the past year with us, but was just learning, step by step as a toddler would, about the man who now helps guide her thoughts and actions. She did not yet have the reassurance and faith to give her cares to Him.
How often we each find ways to cope with struggles inside us without fully releasing them to the only One who can bring us true peace or healing. We hide fears and other emotions that eventually affect our relationships with others, as well as hindering our faith journey. How large our fears and anxiety can grow when we carry it alone.
We have a way to leave our burdens elsewhere. 1 Peter 5:7 tells us, “casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.”
Matthew 10:29-31 says, “Are not two sparrows sold for a copper coin? And not one of them falls to the ground apart from your Father’s will. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.”
God cares about absolutely everything weighing on our heart and in our life.
He simply calls for us to humble ourselves and come before, leaving our pains and stresses, our worries and anxieties at His feet and in His hands. He truly is working in ways we cannot see or hear, cannot think of or comprehend.
The depth of God’s love, so immeasurable that he sent His only Son for us cannot be understood by our human mind. Yet, when we think of the width and depth of the love we carry for our children or spouses, we can begin to understand a portion of what God feels for us.
I don’t know what weights drag you down or cause you suffering or grief, but God does. I can only tell you how sorry I am for what you have and are experiencing. The pain of this world is horrendous. But God has offered us an escape for eternity and in this moment. Jesus weeps when we weep. He dances with joy when we experience delight. He has experienced every emotion we feel and understands every single thought.
We are never alone.
Verses from Song of Solomon 8:6-7 remind me of His exceedingly great love.
“Set me as a seal upon your arm; for love is as strong as death, jealousy as cruel as the grave; its flames are flames of fire, a most vehement flame. Many waters cannot quench love, nor can the floods drown it.”
A most vehement flame cannot be extinguished. True love penetrates beyond feelings, cannot be washed away, is not scared away, and never leaves us. When we stand face to face with Christ one day, love will remain. His love will bring us home to a place He designed for us in heaven.
1 Corinthians 13:13 tells us, “And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.”
When we are living with Jesus one day, we will see Him face-to-face and will no longer live with faith as we do here, for we will eternally be with Him. Hope will cease as we realize all we hoped for is in front of and with us. Love will remain as we live with Jesus daily without the stain or taint of sin that corrupts the world we are now in. Love is the greatest virtue, and our Heavenly Father has given, and modeled perfect, everlasting love for us.
This year has been so unsure for most. Despite the struggles our family has faced through unexpected changes, it has also been a mighty blessing. Every obstacle is an opportunity to lift up our heart to heaven in new ways and let God have the freedom to work His way in our life. Instead of seeing this year as cruel, as filled with doom, I see it as one of the best years I’ve seen. We each have the choice to measure the blessings or the hardships as greater.
Which do you want to guide your life?
Just as my precious, frightened girl feared the unknown she couldn't escape, we each have hardships and triggers that cause us to choose panic and fear over our life journey or to lift our gaze to the only One who can offer release and peace.
Remember Jesus as you face challenges and let His love be refreshed in you this week. Seek Him. Find Him. Rejoice in Him. Allow God to help you see the meaning in, or to simply trust Him for what happens in your life. Moment by moment. Despite circumstances swirling in the media and our culture or society today, persist in looking Up and be guided and calmed by Him. None of what we do matters in this world, unless it is done with and for Him. Thrust your faith roots deeper into the fertile soil God is crafting in your heart.
May we all have a meltdown in our thoughts and heart as we allow ourselves to loosen earthly binds and remove shackles we place on ourselves. Let us release our ties to the nonsense of this world. May we crave what Jesus calls for us and please Him more and more as we lift our eyes and intentions to Him, seeking and grasping what only He can offer.
Father God, we thank You for every trial and hardship we have faced as individuals and as a nation this year. We praise You for Your perfect timing and know that as we trust in and rely more on You that You will turn our nation into a country of believers who set our eyes and intentions on following Your commandments. Grow our desire to be more like Jesus. Let us shine You in this increasingly darker world, Lord, attracting others to You, not ourselves. Turn our hearts toward You and help us to love You, Father, with all our heart, with all our soul, and with all our strength. Help us to keep and treasure Your words in our hearts, thoughts, and intentions. May we teach them diligently to our children, and talk of them when we sit in our house, walk by the way, lie down, and when we rise up. Thank you for patiently waiting for us to allow You to handle our burdens just as You care for the sparrows. One need at a time. In the precious name of Jesus I pray. Amen.
Did you enjoy this episode? Would you like others to hear weekly encouragement and learn how to live with more eternal perspective? Can you think of a friend or family member who might enjoy encouragement? If so, please share this podcast with them and take time to leave a quick rating and review wherever you listen to this podcast. Until next week, keep looking Up and finding new ways to Live With Eternal Perspective.