Purposed Parent/Connected Child Podcast Episode 025 - Facing Hard Stuff to Become a Godlier Parent
Welcome to the Terri Hitt – Purposed Parent/Connected Child Podcast
Episode #025 – Facing Hard Personal Stuff to Become a Godlier Parent
Are you yearning for greater connection with your child? Would you like to parent beyond the moment with eternal perspective? Let’s grow together now with practical tips, scripture, and stories geared to draw your heart to Jesus and guide your child into His arms.
Have you paid attention to the explosion of growth in the personal coaching space? Maybe you’ve used a personal coach or are planning to use one in the future. Did you know that the personal development industry brings in billions of dollars of revenue per year and continues to expand rapidly? In fact, the last report I read was published back in 2017, so it was already very dated, but at that time, the reported yearly revenue was already almost 12 billion.
Let’s stop and look at the definition of coaching for the purpose of this episode. The term “coaching” as defined by the International Coaching Federation (or ICF) as “partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires clients to maximize their personal and professional potential.” The federation reports that they want people to understand that “coaching is an individual service that greatly differs from therapy, consulting, or training.”
Personal development coaches are a large portion of the personal development industry. These coaches help clients understand where they currently are in life, decide where they want to go or who they want to be, and then help them progress toward their determined goal. Acting as a role model or mentor, the coaches guide the way for their clients and hold them accountable.
Different areas of help may include, but are certainly not limited to relationships, faith, parenting, health, finances, weight loss, exercise, work/life balance, and career. There are also different types of personal development coaches, as some work one-on-one with clients and others are such celebrities or influencers with big followings that they never even meet their clients face-to-face. In fact, they may never even know the names of their clients, because books, courses, conferences, and events attract and influence hundreds of thousands of people quarterly.
Why am I reporting all of this coaching information? Because with so many people using coaching services of various kinds, I want to highlight how important it is to make sure that if you decide to work with a person, you ensure the person you choose is a trustworthy mentor or influencer for the vision you have for your life.
More importantly, if you are a follower of Christ, it is crucial to ensure that your guide or coach is a godly Christ follower who wants to help you ensure that you follow God’s purpose for your life.
Remember, if your priority is to be a parent who influences your child with and for the Lord, you must first humbly follow Christ daily.
In order to be a godlier parent tomorrow than you are today, Christ must remain at the center of your mind, heart, desires, and intentions.
Many people do not need coaches to help them because they have found true and righteous healing through Christ. However, many people desire to find help through Jesus as they mature their walk with Him, yet enjoy working with a godly person to educate, guide, and equip them. They may not have wounds to address, but need assistance to move forward with dreams and desires. There are a multitude of reasons a person may choose to work with coaches. Please ensure that if you have one, the individual is centered in Christ and maturing their walk with Him with purposed intention and joy and that Fruits of the Spirit are easily evident.
This episode is shared with the intention of equipping each of us to examine where we currently are and progress toward the goal stated in Philippians 3:14-15 which says, “I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Let those of us who are mature think this way, and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal that also to you.”
Let’s just be honest and say that everyone has done something or has things in their past that they are ashamed of or wish they had handled differently. For those of us with faith in and a future with Christ, we can release the past and embrace the future Christ is revealing to us and enabling us to attain through His direction and strength. In order to become a godlier parent, we must release self to Christ moment by moment, relying on Him to show us the way to live one step at a time.
Through humble submission to Him, we are not who we were yesterday.
Praise God!! I truly mean that!
At the end of each day, believers are able to live with gratitude and offer thanks that we are not even who we were when we awakened at the beginning of the current day.
For this episode, I’ve gathered a list of verses and questions for each of us to ponder in order to keep moving nearer to Christ with intention. As you examine where you are now, you’ll be able to prayerfully lift concerns, failures, questions, worries, or whatever you may be feeling to the Lord and allow Him to carry and craft you into the version He desires for you and also for your child or children to learn and grow from.
I’ve broken these thoughts into three lists. One is for self-examination, one for parental examination, and one for life examination in order to find ways to draw nearer to God in your personal and parenting life. As I read the verses or questions, pray about how God can carry you to meet His requirements for you through the particular verse. Also remember that you don’t have to write each one down. Allow yourself to listen, pray, and ponder. You can visit terrihitt.com to read the transcript and print the verses, if desired.
2 Corinthians 13:5 says, “Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you? —unless indeed you fail to meet the test.”
Psalm 139:23-24 says, “Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!”
Psalm 26:2 says, “Prove me, O LORD, and try me; test my heart and my mind.”
Deuteronomy 8:5 says, “Know then in your heart that, as a man disciplines his son, the LORD your God disciplines you.”
Hebrews 12:11 says, “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”
Job 13:23 says, “How many are my iniquities and my sins? Make me know my transgression and my sin.”
Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?”
Lamentations 3:40 says, “Let us test and examine our ways, and return to the LORD!”
Deuteronomy 6:5-7 says, “You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”
Isaiah 38:19 says, “The living, the living, he thanks you, as I do this day; the father makes known to the children your faithfulness.”
Proverbs 29:17 says, “Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will give delight to your heart.”
Luke 1:17 says, “And he will go before him in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the disobedient to the wisdom of the just, to make ready for the Lord a people prepared.”
Proverbs 17:21 says, “He who sires a fool gets himself sorrow, and the father of a fool has no joy.”
Ephesians 6:4 says, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”
How do you handle problems?
Do you model releasing problems to God or do you attempt to hold onto difficulties?
Do you carry visible stress for your child to witness?
Do your children watch you struggle with problems or humbly ask God to carry them for you?
Do you close down when you are worried or do you turn to God even more?
Are you prone toward depression?
What situations bring on feelings of depression or unhappiness?
What things steal your joy?
Do you try to carry troubles before you lift them to God?
Are you able to lovingly express emotions to your children?
Do you portray loving emotions and offer compliments to your children often?
Is it difficult for you to love or express love to your children because you carry unresolved issues within?
Are you able to easily sacrifice personal desires and comfort for your children?
What do you wish you could change about the way you relate to your children?
Do you parent like you were parented or have you developed your own parenting style under God’s leadership and for each unique child He has entrusted to you?
Do you parent for and under the Lord or parent by reactions?
Do you study scripture so you parent with God’s morals, commands, and heart?
Do you intentionally see your children individually through eyes and heart like God?
Are you prayerfully trying to hear and follow God’s plans for your child?
Are you comfortable with affection from your children?
Do you parent for friend, family, or social media approval or for God’s approval?
How well do you deal with your child’s emotions and needs?
Do you have unresolved issues that keep you from dealing with the hurts and emotions your child faces?
Thank you for listening to this small list of Scripture and specific questions designed for personal examination. It’s crucial to stop and focus with godly intention and not let hours or days pass by without steadying yourself in God’s hand.
Guided living through prayer and Scripture will help each of us see where we need to invite God to work within us. I invite you to make time to study the verses I suggested, as well as other Scripture that comes to mind as you pray. God knows exactly what you and your children need to follow Him and fulfill the beautiful purposes He plans for you.
Everything we endure in life, hard and easy, allows us the opportunity to choose whether we will faithfully walk in humble relationship with Jesus. Life allows us to choose whether we will view life through an eternal and scriptural perspective.
Your life and the lives of your children are significant; you each serve a purpose only God ordained and knows. Live a life that relies on and shines Christ. Allow future generations to build a strong foundation on the legacy of Jesus that they receive from your loving guidance and purposed intention.
Dear Heavenly Father, Your goodness and mercy toward us is the greatest gift, yet You still lavish even more on those who love You and are called according to Your purposes. As we know and follow You, we understand that these gifts are not meant just for our good pleasure, but for Your honor and glory. Thank you for entrusting each of us with the children You have purposed for us and for giving us all we need to raise them for You as we humbly bow at Your feet. You are truly all we need. Life isn’t easy, but You warned us there would be trials and persecution as we follow You. You also promised that You have already overcome the world. Thank you. Help us to see where we need You and where we need less of self. Allow us to transform through Your holy and loving power and grace each moment. In the precious name of Jesus we pray. Amen.
Thank you for listening to the “Purposed Parent/Connected Child” podcast. This and my “Live With Eternal Perspective” podcast may be found at terrihitt.com, iHeart Radio, Spotify, and they are part of the Spark Media Network. Both podcasts may also now be found on the Edifi app, where you can hear thousands of the best Christian podcasts in one place for your listening enjoyment.
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Remember, if we are not purposed in knowing Jesus ourselves and showing Him to the next generation, the world will direct them away from Christ. I pray that what you hear on this podcast draws you nearer to God and helps you cling to Him, despite any circumstances in your life. Until next week, keep looking Up while focusing on new ways to Parent and Connect With Eternal Perspective.