Purposed Parent Connected Child Podcast - Episode 087 - Confident Parenting through God's Strength
Welcome to the Purposed Parent/Connected Child podcast – Episode 087 – Confident Parenting through God’s Strength
Thank you for taking time to share your day with me. I pray this podcast deepens your walk with Jesus and your children.
When you see mothers who’ve raised children who love and follow the Lord do you ever wonder if they have some special secret? Maybe they were just born privileged. Or do you think their faith must be stronger than yours?
I can easily remember being a young mother with little confidence and no knowledge of the Lord. How I’ve changed. Or better yet, how I have been changed. All because of my relationship with Jesus. It’s true that the older I’ve become, the more introspective I am. That says a lot, because I’ve always been a deep thinker. What is most important to me, and something I try not to take for granted, is that because I am now a follower of Christ, my thoughts are more on Him and less on self. My confidence comes from Him, not others, my thoughts, feelings, emotions, or past experiences. This is the kind of confidence I desire every woman, every mother to carry with strength and assurance that only comes through a growing walk with Jesus.
Titus 2:3-6 speaks to what presses on my heart and where He has led me. The verses say, “Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.”
These verses clearly instruct mature believers in the ways we must encourage and help younger believers. By being lovingly mentored in godly words and lifestyles, younger generations of followers of Christ will learn how to live for Him and continue to pass Christlike living and fellowship to the next generation.
The next generation starts with your children. The next generation can confidently be raised for the Lord if you submit to and trust Him to guide and guard you and your family.
Because of Christ, I receive such joy by watching my children grow in wisdom of the Lord. I’m thankful for the walk they have with Christ, especially the relationship my daughters have at their young age. I can’t take credit for the work God has done, and continues to do in their hearts, but I have been purposed in making Him known to them. But it hasn’t always been my main goal. When I parented my first two I came to know Jesus later and it took time for me to be properly submitted to Him and discipled for Him.
Mothers, as you intentionally mature your relationship with Jesus, you become the set-apart woman He intends for you to be. You are able to show Jesus to those in your sphere of influence, and that includes your husband and children. When you do so, you are deciding to live in humble obedience and love for God. Think of how important your decision is for your children and family. As you mature your personal walk with Christ, you are able to better showcase His works within you.
The Bible tells us that when the Holy Spirit lives inside believers, we receive His fruits of the Spirit. Joy is one of the characteristics we receive. I receive such joy in working with younger mothers and equipping them in their walk with Jesus and showing them how to make Him known to their children. What a beautiful gift that we receive those fruits of the Spirit in so many ways and can help others rest in and follow Jesus.
If you are a believing parent, God is relying on you to complete the holy assignment of parenting for Him. I shared the verses from Titus 2 at the beginning of this podcast, because we are not able to complete the instructions given without the power of Christ alive within us. Without submitting to the Holy Spirit’s promptings and guidance within, you and I are unable to live or parent for Christ.
Do you take notice of how many miraculous ways your life has changed since you became a follower of Christ? One of those is gaining a new identity. As you accept and build your new identity in Christ, you are rebuilding a lifetime of beliefs, desires, and learned habits in the truth of God and what He says about you as a woman. Also, in what He says about you as a mother.
You can’t parent godly children without submitting to the Holy Spirit inside you.
The absolute best day in your life as a believer in Christ should be the day you humbly submit your life to Him. While filled with many emotions and feelings in that moment, you probably wondered what the rest of your life would be like with Jesus at your side. However, one of the best revelations or lessons a follower of Christ can realize is that Jesus does not ever belong by your side. The Lord of All, Prince of Peace, Author and Perfecter of our Faith, and the Alpha and Omega holds out His strong and capable hands, ready for you to rest in His arms. This means He isn’t behind or beside you, but should be the One carrying and sustaining you through every disturbance, disruption, and delight.
One of the most basic, but challenging questions in the personal life of a believer is this: I have chosen to trust Jesus for eternity, but am I trusting Him for every moment?
Are you trusting God to show you how to raise the children He has entrusted to you?
I believe that if we examine the story shared about Peter in Matthew 14, we learn valuable insight. Matthew 14:22-33 says, “Immediately He made the disciples get into the boat and go before Him to the other side, while He dismissed the crowds. And after He had dismissed the crowds, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray. When evening came, He was there alone, but the boat by this time was a long way from the land, beaten by the waves, for the wind was against them. And in the fourth watch of the night He came to them, walking on the sea. But when the disciples saw Him walking on the sea, they were terrified, and said, “It is a ghost!” and they cried out in fear. But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, “Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid.” And Peter answered Him, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” He said, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me.” Jesus immediately reached out His hand and took hold of him, saying to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased. And those in the boat worshiped Him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”
What a decision Peter made! He chose to step out of the boat and into the choppy, stormy waters to walk toward Jesus. While His eyes and mind were centered on Jesus, Peter actually walked on the water! When his focus slipped away from Christ and fell to self and surroundings, Peter experienced fear, panic, and difficulties. Jesus had not moved. Christ had not changed. Jesus remained centered on Peter and ready to care for him. Peter’s mind moved away from Jesus and he began to sink.
Your focus determines faith or fear.
Is your parenting style focused on Self or Savior?
While it is easy to blame Peter and belittle his faith, he was willing to be the one who walked toward Jesus. Peter was willing to leave the other disciples, leave what he knew, and venture alone into the turbulent waters toward Jesus. The other men remained unchanged and unmoving inside the boat while Peter took the risk of trusting Christ.
Consider these 4 questions:
Why did the others remain in the boat?
Why didn’t they step out in faith with Peter?
Why is it so difficult to keep mind, heart, and focus on Christ?
Why do people struggle to trust God through occasions and stages of life?
There are actually multiple reasons. Let’s look at what the most common causes are and how we can turn to Scripture to combat them.
1. Trust – It can be difficult to trust or believe in what we cannot see. But Scripture gives clear instructions. God’s Word is inerrant; it is trustworthy. The Holy Word offers hope and assurance.
Hebrews 11:1 says, “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”
John 20:29 says, “Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”
Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths.”
In what ways are you not trusting God in your life? How does that translate in your parenting?
2. Worry/Anxiety – It’s easy to imagine what might happen and allow our thoughts to spiral out of control with anxiety or worry. God offers a far better way. Romans 12:2says, “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”
Matthew 19:26 says, “But Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”
Isaiah 41:10 says, “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.”
1 Peter 5:7 says, “Casting all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you.”
Matthew 6:31-34 says, “Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”
You have a choice. Release worry by releasing control to God or hold onto worry and let it drain your faith and energy. Which do you want to model for your children?
3. Control – We don’t want to relinquish our perceived control. Have you learned yet that control is an illusion? No one has control. No matter how perfect you may try to be or how hard you work, you will never have complete or lasting control. How much easier it is to realize God’s authority and submit to Him.
Matthew 11:28 says, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
Philippians 4:6 says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.”
Psalm 138:8 says, “The LORD will fulfill His purpose for me; your steadfast love, O LORD, endures forever. Do not forsake the work of Your hands.”
What areas of your life do you still grasp too tightly to release to God? How can you let go so that you can teach your children to rely on God?
4. Doubt – When things don’t go the way we desire or think they should or if we begin to wonder why there is hardship and evil in the world, doubt can creep in.
Hebrew 11:1 says, “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”
James 1:6 says, “But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind.”
Matthew 6:30 says, “But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will He not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?”
Where has God worked in your life to show you that He is present? Do you still doubt? What can you do to ensure that your children believe with a heart and mind that will never stray from believing in and following the Lord?
5. Sinfulness – I also like to call this selfishness. When we don’t want to give up sin, we are choosing self over Christ. We’re also choosing self over those we love or are in our life. Personal sin always affects those who love us, especially your spouse or children.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20 says, “Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”
1 John 1:8 says, “If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.”
Romans 7:22-23 says, “For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members.”
Matthew 6:33 says, “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”
What areas of your life are selfish? Where are you not releasing sin? How can you ask God to carry you and carve a new heart and mindset that releases self and chooses the Savior? How do you plan to model that lifestyle for your children?
6. Arrogance/Pride – Pride rears up in each of us through different ways. Whether it be entitlement, perfectionism, bragging, when we think we’re superior to someone, deserve something more than another, or should be before another, the root of each thought ties back to arrogance or pride.
Isaiah 2:12 says, “For the LORD of hosts has a day against all that is proud and lofty, against all that is lifted up—and it shall be brought low.”
James 4:6 says, “But He gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”
James 4:10 says, “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will exalt you.”
Philippians 2:3 says, “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.”
Proverbs 11:2 says, “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom.”
Proverbs 16:5 says, “Everyone who is arrogant in heart is an abomination to the LORD; be assured, he will not go unpunished.”
It’s so humbling just to read the verses God has given us about humility. How will you teach your children to be humble before the Lord and others? How will you model that fort hem?
7. Unworthiness – As a believer in Christ, you have been bought with a price. The life of Jesus was exchanged so you could begin to understand your great worth to God.
Isaiah 43:18 says, “Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old.”
Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
Psalm 56:8 says, “Record my misery; list my tears on your scroll — are they not in Your record?”
Psalm 139:14 says, “I praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are Your works; my soul knows it very well.”
Matthew 6:26 says, “Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?”
Ephesians 2:10 says, “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”
How will you teach your children their worthiness and identity through Christ? It starts when you realize your confidence in who you are through Him.
8. Fear – When fear creeps in, it is because you have taken your mind and eyes off of God and centered them on self or surroundings. Every time I have felt fear even begin to touch me I stop and focus on Jesus (and in my mind I actually picture blinders on my face that force my vision upwards on God). As I rest in His presence and pray to Him about the situation I am fearing, He takes the burden and calms any fears. It is said that God leaves the message “Do not fear” 365 times in the Bible. I'm not sure whether that is an accurate count, but I trust that the Lord gives us the command for daily use because He knows our thoughts can easily be distracted. He knows how easily we move from His sovereign holiness and perfect provision and protection.
Psalm 34:4 says, “I sought the LORD, and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears.”
Psalm 94:19 says, “When the cares of my heart are many, Your consolations cheer my soul.”
Psalm 115:11 says, “You who fear the LORD, trust in the LORD! He is their help and their shield.”
Psalm 118:6 says, “The LORD is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me?”
Matthew 6:34 says, “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”
John 14:27 says, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.”
Do you want your child to live with fear or faith? Show them the example they need to grasp the hope and peace that is in Christ. Help them find faith that carries them past fear while they are young.
9. Faith – Perhaps your belief doesn’t feel real or big enough. Maybe difficult times in the past, unanswered prayers, or present hardships cause you to feel like God has forsaken you or that He isn’t real. Each of the points we discussed can arguably return back to the thought of faith that is too little. But remember, God’s Word tells us all we need is a faith the size of a mustard seed. Tend to that seed so it will mature and be rooted in God’s truth, then let it grow and mature through Christ.
Romans 5:3-5 says, “Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.”
James 1:2-4 says, “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”
Romans 8:18 says, “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.”
You know how easy it can be to allow self or situations to distract you and move your eyes off Christ. Being aware of this offers opportunity to purposely prepare to be ahead of your next season of trials. Intentionally living in ways that set you up to trust God gives assurance that your focus will not be easily swayed in this moment or tomorrow.
How can you live in ways that set you up to live and parent with eternal perspective? How will you teach your children to trust God for each day, as well as for eternity?
Let’s look at 7 ways:
1. Know Jesus through a personal relationship.
2. Read and study God’s word together.
3. Prayer – speak to God and listen for God and pray with your children.
4. Pursue close relationship with God daily. Seek Him in all the minute happenings and large events.
5. Ask God to transform yourlife.
6. Use everyday moments to make God known to your children. Inhale and exhale Him with love and clarity.
7. Take your thoughts captive for Christ and see the difference He makes to a surrendered soul.
If you look at the transcript from this episode after listening, you’ll be able to read the Scriptures referenced and refer to the questions I asked throughout this episode. Look back at them and ponder the following questions to help you grow in relationship withand confidence in the Lord in your personal and parenting life.
1. What does this verse promise?
2. What does this verse command?
3. Where do I need to apply this in my life and in the way I parent?
Dear Heavenly Father, How great You are! You are so far above us, yet remain within us through Jesus. Thank you for all you have given us and still desire to provide for us. Help us to be the women You call us to be. Help us to be the mothers you have designed us to become. Please help our children to follow Jesus and clearly show Him to the next generation. May it be that no generation after us shall stray from you because we raise our children in Your wisdom and goodness. Thank you for giving us Your Son and Your holy Word as a guide and a shield. We ask these things in the precious name of Christ. Amen.
If you’re a working mom inside or outside the home and need an easy way to begin teaching your babies, toddlers, or preschoolers about Jesus, send me an email at info@terrihitt.com. I’m currently working on a devotional to bring your children to the feet of Jesus early. Let me know you’re interested, and I’ll let you know how to receive a copy.
Also, you may have heard me talk about the Set-Apart Collective often in this podcast. Why do I share it so often? I know the program works. Through 6 weeks of one-on-one and group coaching, along with Scripturally-based materials I provide, you will complete 8 steps that include the following: Seek God First, Establish Identity, Teach Truth, A Set-Apart Woman, Parent Set-Apart Kids, Arm for Battle, Relationships, and Training. What you learn and solidify in your personal life will directly affect the way you serve God and parent for Him. It will help you construct godly confidence and esteem through Christ in your children.
If you’re ready to invest in the future of your children, contact me at info@terrihitt.com for more details or visit terrihitt.com/setapart. Because you are a podcast listener, let me know you heard about the special price I’m offering you. I seriously want you to experience results and live a set-apart life with a set-apart family. Instead of a $997 value, I’ll give you a discount code that enables you to pay only $247. If you are serious about parenting with eternal perspective and raising children to chase Christ over culture, I’m making this very affordable and easy to do.
Why? Because supporting and encouraging mothers to rest in Christ and pursue a holy relationship with Him so they purposely raise set-apart children is the cry of my heart. Godly parenting is rooted in relationship with Christ and the mindset a mother carries. That’s why I’ve created the Set-Apart Collective.
If you’ve decided peers and culture won’t be the main influence over your child and you desire to parent to prepare your child for eternity with Christ, the Set-Apart Collective, will deepen your walk with Christ. You’ll learn a Christ-centered Motherhood Mindset Model™, and create a Purposed Parenting Plan™. You will be a purposed mother with an intentional mind and heart set on Christ and your family. The Set-Apart Collective is open now. Please send me an email at info@terrihitt.com to let me know you’d like to receive information or look online at terrihitt.com/setapart. We can also set up a 15 minute call to chat about details. It’s time for believing mothers to be purposed in preparing their children for a lifetime pursuit of Christ.
If you connected in some way with this episode, would you please rate and review the podcast on Apple or Spotify? It only takes a minute or so and makes a big difference in people finding the podcast. You and I know that the best reviews are by word of mouth, so would you please choose a friend to recommend the show to? Let them know that the podcast is found at terrihitt.com, Apple Podcasts, and Spotify. Imagine the change we will see in the way mothers parent for Christ if they learn to be intentional, too.
Remember, if you’re not purposed in knowing Jesus and showing Him to the next generation, the world will likely sway your children away from Christ. I pray that what you hear on this podcast enables you to stop being a good mom and focus on being a godly parent. Until next week, keep looking Up while focusing on new ways to parent with eternal purpose and connection.