Purposed Parent Connected Child Podcast Episode 122 - Do You Know How to Play With Your Kids?
Welcome to the Purposed Parent/Connected Child podcast – Episode 122 – Do You Know How to Play With Your Kids?
Thank you for sharing your day with me. I pray this podcast gives you the awareness and tools you need to STOP being a GOOD mom and BECOME the GODLY mom God entrusts you to be. Then you will be the SET-APART woman PURPOSELY raising children to chase CHRIST over culture.
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Now on to this episode that raises an important question…Do you Know How to Play With Your Kids?
My Grandma Smith had the greatest ability to make me laugh. I remember going to her house was a treat I looked forward to. I always knew she’d do something funny or sit on the floor and tickle me. She simply acted like a kid while still maintaining authority. I always felt safe and loved with her.
I often think of Grandma when I play with my kids. I have to ask…have you played today? One of the perks of being a mom is recognizing and cherishing the ability to keep childlike qualities – or rediscover the inner child alive in our heart. As for me, I’ve never lost the ability to intertwine the little girl still living inside with the adult me. Maybe it’s because God created me with a strong imagination, but I also like to think that I just enjoy connection. Like Grandma seemed to with me.
After parenting two sets of children over two generations, I’ve had an extended period of playtime. In fact, my siblings were five and six years younger than me, and I had a lot of experience playing with my sister before I ever became a mom at the age of eighteen.
Numerous memories are easily brought to mind when I think back over the years I’ve enjoyed playing with kids. When my first child, my daughter Jaime was almost two, I was at a local park with her and two children I cared for at the time. With three children under two years old, I had to be creative in the way I kept them all together and entertained.
On that particular day in the park, we mastered the slide over and over. The kids were gleeful as I had them lined up in front of me, each securing their little arms around the waist of the child in front of them. My legs were wrapped around everyone as we slid towards the bottom.
When my first set of kids were growing up, I remember playing baseball with my son. Now I have to state that I’m one of the most athletically-challenged people in the world. Athleticism is not a gift God chose for me. So when I say I played baseball, please know that it shows the depth of love I have for my boy. It also shows his patience with me.
I remember times of throwing pitches for Brandon to practice hitting, then switching places and letting him practice pitching to me. That was a sacrifice! I’ve never been able to catch any ball, whether it be small like a baseball or a large kickball. Instead of spreading my arms out to gracefully receive the ball, I usually duck my head and scream.
But guess what? Playing ball with my son was such a joy. In fact, he’s the only person who can throw a pitch I can hit. Somehow, he knew exactly how to throw that ball in a way I trusted and could connect with. I hope he felt as special as I did in those moments.
There were also other play times with my kids using typical childhood toys, as well as playing dress-up, Play Doh, drawing or coloring, dancing, and acting. What are some of the ways you play with your children? Or your grandchildren?
My youngest daughter and I still have a date for play time daily. It’s what she looks forward to most each day. When I keep my word to place her above anything else during the time we spend together, joy radiates from her eyes and movements.
If you are actively pursuing play as a way to teach and connect, I applaud you. Then I say, “keep on.” When we enjoy playing with our children, we understand that we are building connection that can’t be created any other way.
The benefits of playing with our children are high. As I stated earlier, not only do we experience a deeper bonding and attachment experience, but our children receive benefits such as a wider vocabulary, patience, trust, resilience, strengthened social skills, and higher cognitive development.
Despite the love of electronics in this day and age, I say ditch those and find other ways to play such as the following:
Toys – From the earliest of time with your child, you can play with toys together. I’m also going to place books and music in this category, and for every age group. Lullabies and Christian music are especially sweet. Books are a means of making time together special Sitting together as you read lends a special closeness and connection from an early age, plus reaps many of the benefits I spoke of earlier. Reading to your child often and regularly also helps them to be better prepared and more eager to read to you as time progresses. Letting yourself simply have fun with baby toys and age-appropriate toys with your child will expand creativity for you both.
Physical Play – While building relationship and connection, you’re also building muscles, coordination, and strength.
Outdoor Play – This can include physical play, as well as walks and nature studies. These activities allow both parent and child to experience fresh air, sunshine, appreciation, curiosity, imagination, and time together.
Pretend Play – Even more imagination abounds with pretend play, which also builds curiosity, connection, and joy. Enjoy yourself. Let yourself be whatever age your child is. Or let yourself become an imaginary friend, creature, or whatever the situation calls for. Simply have fun.
Through play, children learn, reduce stress, build connection with you, release fears, and work out problems. Through this process, parents are often alerted to thoughts and interests they may not have been made aware of yet. As my daughter and I play, I can tell things she’s concerned about or thinking. I also see how she responds to those thoughts or feelings through the way she has characters respond and react.
Children are wired to play. So were you once. In fact, I bet you still are, even if you don’t realize it. When kids are able to play in early years, essential neural pathways are created that impact future learning. When kids experience sensory rich play and creative exploration, their time spent playing with you becomes more than recreation, and should be recognized as an investment in a critical piece of childhood development.
For a more joyful childhood and future adult life, invest in playtime with your children. Mind, body, and spirit are transformed through such a simple act. If you think you don’t have time, I say you can’t afford to neglect making the time.
If you’re not used to playing, let me list a few suggestions you might enjoy. Hearing them might spur your mind to come up with even more.
Reading is very important at any age. Reading together, even when your kids are older is a fabulous bonding experience. As a homeschool mom, this is one of my favorite tips. Even when my girls were teens we read together. We still do daily when we sit to read the Bible together.
Walking is also an easy activity to enjoy together. My middle daughter and I enjoy this activity year round. We’re outside together unless the weather makes it impossible. Through this simple act, we share so many stories and plans. We share our heart, give and hear advice, and simply enjoy one another. Our laughter is so full we’re often doubled over, barely able to walk, and that incredible connection strengthens our bond.
You can also observe nature with your children. This activity is an easy way to begin conversations and talk about the Lord as you observe His creation, the seasons, or the weather.
If you’re looking for more age-based suggestions, I’ll list a few. Again, this is a short list to get you thinking about what might be enjoyed together in your home.
Six months – Recite short rhymes, prayers, condensed Bible stories, sing, play Peek-A-Boo, Pat-A-Cake, find your ears, nose, etc.
Cover toys with a cloth or blanket and uncover to find.
Nine months – Play imitation and “find it” games
Twelve months – Fill containers or play instruments (anything from a pot and lid to an empty paper towel roll can become an instrument or you may invest in age appropriate instruments.
Eighteen months – Memory games with music, cards, or toys. Sorting or matching games are also fun.
Two to Three years – Music with movement, silly dances, Follow the Leader, Dress-up, Dolls, Play Doh
Four to Seven Years – Simon Says, Climbing activities (yes, you can climb, too), Parks, play house, dolls, or ball.
Eight to Twelve Years – Puzzles, mazes, word finds, crossword puzzles, strategy games, physical games
Thirteen to Seventeen – Musical Instruments, Dancing, Acting, Sports
All of these are activities that you can do with your child, not just watch them participate. Throughout the lifetime of your child, play is one of the best investments you can make for both of you. Skills, mental and emotional health, and connection are shaped grown, and maintained through this remarkably simple activity. You know your children. Find what they enjoy and jump in with them.
Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for Your mighty presence in this world, our lives, and in our heart through the Holy Spirit alive in us. We need Your guidance and leadership. Help us to shine You. Help us to connect with our children in ways that merge the beautiful interests and talents You crafted into them and all You have purposed within us. Help us enjoy the youthfulness, imagination, and love You have placed within us. Let us recognize all the gifts You have in store for us as we invest in time with You and our family. In the precious name of Jesus we pray. Amen.
Raising children is challenging. No one has all the answers because each child is unique as are parenting styles and family dynamics. By connecting with and knowing your children as you maintain purposed growth in Christ, you will be better prepared for any situation you face.
That’s why you hear me share about the Set-Apart Collective in this podcast. I work with professionals who care about making Jesus known to their children. Are you a high-achieving woman who loves Jesus, but is so busy with the rush of work and daily life that you feel like you’re being drained like the water in your bathtub? Do you yearn to get closer to Jesus and show Him to your kids so you will create a love that will last into eternity? The desire is there, but your days spiral out of control before you even think about opening your Bible.
Do you ever stop to think that you are the first Jesus your child will see? Let me remind you there is hope. There is a way you can be equipped to raise kids who chase Christ over culture. If you want a connected relationship with Christ and your children that leads them to your side and His feet, instead of them seeking validation from peers, I have an 8-step program to move you from frustrated to fulfilled. I will show you how to reflect Jesus in a way that attracts your family to a connected relationship that lasts into eternity.
Remember, godly parenting is rooted in relationship with Christ and the mindset you carry. If you don’t want peers and culture to be the main influence over your child, if you desire to parent to “prepare” your child for eternity with Christ, not repair your relationship with them, the Set-Apart Collective will arm you with a Christ-centered Motherhood Mindset Model™, and create a Purposed Parenting Plan™. You’ll also deepen your identity in Christ so you can mentor the way for your children to do the same. You will be a purposed mother with an intentional mind and heart set on Christ and your family and you will have the tools to raise set apart kids as you parent the heart, not simply the behavior.
Does this sound like a lifeline to help you be that set-apart mom God has entrusted you to be? Visit terrihitt.com/coaching and click the link for a free, no obligation conversation call with me. This is a strategic call where I will hear your biggest struggle and show you how to turn it into a blessing that will bring you closer to Christ and your children. It’s time for believing mothers to be purposed in preparing their children for a lifetime pursuit of Christ. Time is short. Make yours matter for eternity.
One last thing to remember - if you’re not purposed in knowing Jesus and showing Him to the next generation, the world will sway your children away from Christ. I pray that what you hear on this podcast enables you to stop being a good mom and focus on being a godly parent. Until next week, keep looking Up while focusing on new ways to parent with eternal purpose and connection with your children and Christ.