The Answer to Building Identity Rooted in Christ - Part 1

As a mother appointed by God, you have the sacred privilege of leading the children entrusted to you to find an important answer. A sacred truth. Who they are.

You know the answer to building identity rooted in Christ isn't found in the shifting voices of the world, but in the unchanging truth of who they are in Christ. How do you ensure you guide them to that important truth?

Performance or Popularity?

As your children grow, they'll reach for pieces of identity everywhere they look. They notice how others dress, what they achieve, who’s accepted, and who’s left out. They start collecting clues about what they must do in order to become who they want to be. Some of their ideas and desires seem good, some confusing, while many slowly pull them away from truth.

Kids don’t realize that while the world is directing them to find themselves, God invites them to know Himself. It’s imperative that you ensure your kids know who He is, so they begin to understand Whose they are.

As an adult, you know that discovery doesn’t come through performance or popularity. The truth of who they are comes through relationship with Christ, through God’s truth, and through your steady guidance and prayers. The petitions of a mom whose own heart is anchored in Christ.

The BIG Question

Every person eventually asks, “Who am I?” That question may not come in words, but it will definitely show up in actions. Or it could be in choices, friendships, or frustrations.

For moms, this question can be both beautiful and heartbreaking to witness when see our children wrestle with this question. When you see your precious children trying on new versions of themselves, wanting to fit in, wanting to be noticed, wanting to belong, you don't want them being pulled by voices that promise confidence but often deliver confusion.

But here’s what I want you to remember: your child’s search for identity isn’t something to fear—it’s something to shepherd.

The Maker of Heaven and earth, the creator of your children designed them with creativity. He gave them minds them to seek, to wonder. God created them with a longing to understand who they are and why they’re here. As moms, we know that their desire, when guided by truth, can lead them straight to Him.

Ephesians 2:10 says, “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”

That verse offers comfort. But even more important, it’s a statement – a truth - about identity. It’s God declaring over your child: You belong. You are known. You are Mine.

When your kids grasp the truth that they already belong, they’re loved with an everlasting love, and they were created with purpose for a purpose, they learn to stop chasing temporary labels of identity and start claiming eternal purpose.

Finding the Answer to Building Identity Rooted in Christ

Remember, as your children wrestle with who they are, you’ve been bestowed with the most sacred role a mother can carry—mentoring godliness and guiding your children to the feet of Jesus.

The world tells you your job is to shape behavior. Or manage the outcomes of their behavior. To grow your kids to self-reliant adulthood. But God commands you to nurture hearts that hear His voice. That obey. That honor and please Him.

You’ve probably discovered that motherly influence isn’t found in perfect lectures or polished parenting moments. It’s found in the quiet, consistent ways you show Christ at home. It’s seen in the way you respond when you’re tired, when your kids push your limits, or when their choices break your heart. Your influence is established in the desires you carry, the words you use, and the way you spend your time.

Your actions and responses teach the children entrusted to you who God is - and how He loves. But, despite that truth, I want you to remember something important. You don’t to be perfect to lead well. Relax. You’ll never reach that level of parenthood. You’re an imperfect woman in an imperfect world. But your humility will speak louder than your strength. Because it's rooted in Him. His strength. Your words and actions will be laid on the foundation of who you are in Christ.

Your heart for Jesus is made apparent even when you feel you failed. It’s in the way you handle mistakes, the way you invite your children into your space, the way you listen, the way you meet their gaze with joy and love. When you admit mistakes and model repentance, your children begin to understand what grace looks like. As you consistently pursue Christ, they see your dedication in His Word, the way you model integrity, and the love you carry for Him. They hear and feel it in the way you respond to them as your life shines His.

Deuteronomy 6:5–7 says, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. These words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children… when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”

This passage of Scripture isn’t a formula—it’s an command to weave God’s truth into everyday life. To weave Him into every breath. To become His voice in an ungodly society attracting and influencing your children. So when your child asks, “Who am I?” your voice can affirm what God has already spoken: “You are His.” “You are chosen.” “You are deeply loved.”

Be sure to come back for Part 2 of this post.

In the meantime, if your heart is whispering, “I want to raise my children differently,” the Set-Apart Collective™ is where you’ll find the support and discipleship tools to support you. Join me inside the Set-Apart Collective™ where you'll discover how to raise kids to chase Christ over culture and influence generations for Christ.